Dear Walter,
When you called me a ditzy blonde, dumped me, and said I'd never amount to anything, that hurt. That really hurt. It made me want to find a way to get back at you. So I went to college, got my bachelor's degree in business administration, then went after (and got) my MBA. I dabbled in the prediction market, got lucky, then got into the green market with EviroGood, an eco-friendly packaging company, and business is crazy booming! I have a swanky condo in LA and, as you can see, I'm in the proverbial lap of luxury. I'm also showing you the one thing you kept me begging for, and now you'll never get: my sweet pussy!
Sayonara, buttmunch!
Lorena