Zombie Action In A Dive Bar

Lately, I've been heading into the San Fernando Valley to see the extent of the zombie infestation. It's pretty much what I've seen in LA during my periodic supply runs. In North Hollywood, though, there was something unusual: a topless dive bar that, somehow, was still open and functioning. I parked my SUV near the bar entrance, made sure I had my zombie survival stuff with me, and walked toward the bar. The G-Spot was the name of the joint. Interesting. Inside the bar, there was low mumbling among the several zombie patrons. A dancer, wearing a black choker and a black thong, shambled onto the dance stage and, as the sound system belted out The Go-Go's "Head over Heels," started gyrating to the music. The dancer, a girl with short, messy blonde hair and huge tits (whose name, according to a slurred male zombie voice, was Kandy), kept her shambles simple as the song played. When the song finished, some of the zombie audience applauded (or tried to). Next up was Men at Work's "Who Can It Be Now?" and Kandy continued her shamble-dancing. The zombies inhabiting the dive bar were, for want of a better word, mellow. I looked at my watch, checked the time, and eased my way slowly out of The G-Spot. You never want to risk inadvertently startling a zombie. Keep it smooth and keep it slow. Words to live by.